Daily Humor Headline 06/29/07
June 29th, 2007
Archive: June, 2007
Isaiah Washington fired from Grey’s Anatomy
June 29th, 2007
“Can you spare a tv show?”
Tinsel Town - Isaiah Washington was recently fired from Grey’s Anatomy after ABC decided they didn’t want a “raging homophobe.” And when you say words like “faggot,” clearly you hate gays and everything they stand for. Get your rage on Washington:
I had a person in human resources tell me after this thing played out that ’some people’ were afraid of me around the studio. I asked her why, because I’m a 6-foot-1, black man with dark skin and who doesn’t go around saying ‘Yessah, massa sir’ and ‘No sir, massa’ to everyone? It’s nuts when your presence alone can just scare people, and that made me a prime candidate to take the heat in a dysfunctional family.
People still cross the street when they see Washington. Isaiah dropped a reality check on Hollywood with this:
My mistake was believing that I would get the support from my network and all of my cast mates across the board. My mistake was believing I could correct a wrong with honesty and sincerity. My mistake was thinking black people get second chances. I was wrong on all fronts.
Whoa whoa! Black people get second chances. Look at OJ. He got acquitted and people LOVE him.
Oh you mean that OJ?
Portland Recruits Oldest Man in Universe
June 29th, 2007
“Here is a collage I put of Oden. I got lazy after two pictures.”
Portland, OR - In the first round of the NBA draft, the Portland Trail Blazers picked Ohio’s Greg Oden. Oden who has shown exceptional skill right out of high school would have been drafted earlier if not for that pesky new age requirement from the NBA. Here is Oden bellowing out a few words:
I’m a better player because of that year in college. Coach (Thad) Matta, he taught me so much, first about being a young man growing up in Columbus.
By the time this guy reaches 25, he is going to look 150 years old. He looks like he should be playing with Patrick Ewing in the Senior Citizens Basketball Association. He looks like he should ready to collect retirement checks. He looks like he enjoys dinner at 4pm. He looks like a candidate for shuffle board king. He looks like Moses when he saw God on the mountain. He looks.. old.
I ran: out.
Jack-O…Lantern?
June 29th, 2007
“I shall defend Mexico!!”
Apparently for Michael Jackson, everyday should be Halloween. Not only does he bear an uncanny resemblance to Cryptkeeper, but now he makes his children wear masks when they go out in public. Those poor children. I’m sure it’s not terrible to have Neverland as your own amusement park,(though I will feel bad when they grow up and find out that the real reason he built it is because he’s a crazy pedophile) but now, they’re forced to walk around with masks on, like it was Halloween or a bad 70’s swingers party.
Man those kids are gonna be f–ked up when they get older. Poor little Paris Jackson is going to have an identity crisis (much like her father), except instead of wanting to be white, she’ll want to be Zorro. Tip your cap Jack-O, on a parenting job well done! Not for too long though, the sun might melt off the rest of your face.
Sexy People Don’t Eat Meat
June 28th, 2007
“I’ll have the pork chops! Hold the fruit”
PETA’s annual “World’s Sexiest Vegetarian Celebrities” results were released Tuesday with Grammy Award Winning artist, Carrie Underwood, and “Tonight Show” band leader, Kevin Eubanks, topping this year’s list.
Jay Leno has been campaigning for Eubanks, even putting him on display by showing a shirtless picture of him on air to entice voters.
This year over 110,000 voters logged on to the PETA website to vote. Runners up include Joaquin Phoenix, Toby Maguire and Kristen Bell.
Why isn’t there an appeal to host the “Worlds Sexiest Meat Eating Celebrities?” Tearing the flesh off animal bones with your teeth is such a turn-on.
5 Reasons Why This Dream Car is Better Than Yours!?
June 28th, 2007
“Hmm.. close but no cigar.”
BMW calls their cars the “ultimate driving machine.” It’s about time someone rendered that title null and void. A few years ago, while stuck in traffic, a friend and I created what would be the end all be all of cars. This assault on vehicles will be what Mercedes Benz calls “unlike any other.” And the only ties it would have to any car company would be the location at which this behemoth on wheels would be sold (more on that later). Lexus calls each one of their cars, the “pursuit of perfection.” The race is over.
Fashionistas Become Social!
June 28th, 2007
The Net - MySpace launched its beta of MySpace Fashion back in January and already has close to 50,000 members. With partnerships including Nylon Magazine and Instyle.com, MySpace Fashion consists of a featured designer section, featured events and a box of syndicated news from its partner, InStyle.com.
Not only is MySpace dabbling in fashion on the designer side, but last week, the ever growing online community partnered with Ford Models’ Supermodels of the World Search. MySpace will house clips of behind-the-scenes footage from the search.
This is good news for the female members of MySpace who take pictures of themselves making sure their cleavage looks hot. They now have a chance to see what it’s really like to be a model, and can now check out clothes on MySpace Fashion so they can finally dress themselves for their next default pic.
