Back in the day when the United States and Britain used to have their little quibbles, they used to draw cartoons of Uncle Sam tugging the British Lion’s tail. I remember this because looking at the cartoons was about the only thing cool about history class. Anyway, it appears the British Lion has been replaced by the mange ridden alleycat(pictured above riding the Prime Minister’s head), while the tugging Uncle Sam has been replaced by a rectally administered Iranian firecracker. Here’s Britain’s tough response to Iran holding its troops hostage:

Britain took its case to free its 15 sailors and marines held by Iran to the United Nations on Thursday, asking the Security Council to support a statement that would “deplore” Tehran’s action and demand their immediate release. But Security Council diplomats said the brief press statement circulated by Britain’s U.N. Mission is likely to face problems from Russia and others because it says the Britons were “operating in Iraqi waters”—a point that Iran contests.

The British move came as Iran rolled back on its promise to release the sole female British sailor among the captives, who were seized last week. The Iranian military chief, Gen. Ali Reza Afshar, said that because of the “wrong behavior” of the British government, “the release of a female British soldier has been suspended,” the semiofficial Iranian news agency Mehr reported.

DEMAND RELEASE…or else? More yelling I suppose? I don’t think verbal condemnation will work, and I can see Ahmadinejad taunting Tony Blair via videoconference with an iPod in his ear, listening to “buddha-buddha-derka-derka” music, or, maybe he just goes for the straight up “I can’t hear you nanananana” and sticks his tongue out. And maybe the guy from Angola or some other third world UN representative snickers out loud and his funny hat falls off and everyone else laughs too.

Ten million Brits are probably furious about Tony Blair’s wideset vagina after reading….this