“Probably a better place to leave your kid next time.”

Glendale, Wisconsin – A couple strapped their 14 month old baby into a stroller at home so they could go out and party. Rachel Anderson and her boyfriend, Mitch Laputka are set to face charges on neglect and possibly general stupidity. Granted kids suck, but the child, Gabriel was found with a diaper rash, body temperature 12 degrees below normal and unconscious. According to police, the couple recent got jobs at Pizza Hut (quite an aspiration) and decided to celebrate their paychecks by going out. Anderson admitted to changing the baby once a day and Laputka said that he didn’t do diapers. But apparently, he does fat chicks. Neighbor, Dennis Ogilvie, who has a daughter the same age had this to say:

I knew they had a baby, but I never saw them with him.

That might have been because the baby was strapped to a stroller and you wouldn’t let your kid play with their kid because you knew they lived off a healthy diet consisting of pepsi and stale bread sticks. These are the type of couples that need to be sterilized with steel toe Lugz or whatever sketchy people wear when stomping in some asses.

i strap my child: here