Every time I see a cute little girl chasing balloons or adorably holding her daddy’s finger with her pint sized hand I am compelled to rethink my contempt for the dreaded possibility of fathering girls. Then I read stories like this one and I go into what can only be described as a “cringe coma.”

PORTLAND, Maine - After an outbreak of pregnancies among middle school girls, education officials in this city have decided to allow allow one school’s health center to make birth control pills available to girls as young as 11.

King Middle School will become the first middle school in Maine to make a full range of contraception available, including birth control pills, patches and condoms. There are no national figures on how many middle schools provide such services. Most middle schoolers range in age from 11 to 13.

When I was 11 there were the one or two hormonally advanced girls that had some semblance of breasts and were the object of everyone’s affection. Maybe, just maybe one of them came from a difficult family situation and was raging against her parents enough for one or two guys to get a chance at playing doctor. By the time I have kids, I fully expect to walk them into a Kindergarten class that’s more Dutch brothel than Disney Channel.

CRINGE!